Looking Glass: I just dropped by for a beer; I left my clothes at home

A woman, wearing only a blanket, entered her neighbor’s home in Horton Township, Pa., through the basement door, walked upstairs and stole a can of beer from the fridge. A teenage resident convinced her to leave through the front door, but before she did, she dropped the blanket and revealed her naked body to him. When the cops arrived, she was sitting on the front porch drinking the beer. Officers said that she seemed to be under the influence of drugs.

SO HIS CREDIBILITY LEAVES SOMETHING TO BE DESIRED: Security officials found an eight-inch dagger concealed in the sole of the right shoe of a man who was attempting to enter the Volusia County Courthouse in DeLand, Fla. He told police that that the shoes weren’t his. To make matters worse, he was arrested last year for firing a shotgun at people who didn’t exist.

HEY, WHAT ARE ALL THESE COPS DOING HERE?: While police officers were serving a search warrant on the home of a doctor who wrote hundreds of fraudulent prescriptions for drug addicts, two people showed up to pick up their fraudulent prescriptions.

I KNOW HOW THIS MUST LOOK, OFFICER: Police, who detained a man in Grand Terrace, Calif., because they suspected that he was a drug dealer, searched his car where they found nearly 42 pounds of cocaine with an estimated street value of about $700,000.

WELL, WELL, WHAT HAVE WE HERE?: A man who was pulled over for a traffic violation in Kamiah, Idaho, bolted from his car and tried to throw a Tupperware container with half an ounce of methamphetamine into a nearby river. But it bounced off a tree and didn’t make it to the water. The deputy saw the whole thing.

OH, NO, AFTER YOU, SIR: A man acted like a customer at a convenience store in Houston by buying a face mask and waiting around until actual customers did their business and left. He then put on the mask, pulled out a gun and robbed the place.

OUR COMPLIMENTS TO THE CHEF … NOW STICK ‘EM UP!: Three members of a family had a meal at a Waffle House in Hillsboro, N.C., and then one of them pulled a gun and demanded money. The three fled to a nearby gas station leaving in separate cars. They are wanted for doing the same thing in Minden, La., a few days earlier.

I WAS LOOKING FOR THE LADIES’ TEE, OFFICER: An intoxicated 58-year-old woman, with an open bottle of Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Fire Whiskey, was arrested for driving a golf cart on Interstate 95 in Titusville, Fla.

HONEY, I BROUGHT HOME SOME DINNER: Someone broke into a home in Lewis Township, Pa., and stole a 5-pound bag of Mrs. T’s Pierogies. He didn’t take anything else.

COME BACK! WE ALREADY KNOW WHO YOU ARE!: Police pulled over a man who was driving recklessly in San Rafael, Calif., but, when they realized that he had an outstanding felony warrant for his arrest, he fled, stole a paddle board and jumped into a nearby canal.